“A bunch of mindless jerks who will be the first against the wall…”

Mark Sheppard reacts in surprise as he hears his own quote...

So genre darling and man of a million cult TV roles Mark Sheppard has been announced as the latest name for the BBC’s official Doctor Who convention later this year.  You know, the one that repeats itself like an unwelcome belch the next day.

And this is the quote that the BBC’s press release ascribes to Sheppard.

“I grew up watching Doctor Who, and the fans are a huge part of what really makes the show so very special. I can’t wait to come back to Cardiff for this unprecedented behind-the-scenes event – a unique chance for fans to meet the amazing people responsible for so much of the show we all love and get to experience their talent and creativity in a totally new way”

For fuck’s sake, BBC.  If you’re going to invent PR quotes for someone, at least make them sound like a human being said them.  ”Unprecedented behind-the-scenes event”? ”Experience their talent and creativity”?

Phrases unlikely to be heard in human speech outside the cocaine-flecked meeting rooms of west London PR agencies who couldn’t pick Mark Sheppard out of a line-up.  The only thing missing from that quote is some reference to ‘synergy between fans and creators’.

Doctor Who.  Marketed by a bunch of joyless fuckknuckles, ladies and gentlemen.